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Entries in Sujitha (24)

Tuesday
May012012

Return to India, Part 20: The groom rides a white horse to the temple, there is dancing in the street; Sujitha and Manoj are wed

I will begin here, with Manoj astraddle the white horse, his bride, brothers and other family behind him, even though the wedding had commenced earlier. The day's ceremonies had begun with a symbolic making of the marital bed, a portrait of Lakshmi at the head, bride and groom dolls and an abundance of food, fertility and prosperity laid out over the bedspread. This was followed by a blessing ceremony, after which the bride and groom changed into their wedding clothes and gathered outside.*

The groom then mounted the white mare. The bride stepped up behind him with his brothers, sisters and other family members on both sides of her. At my side, the blue tail end barely in the fame, was a kind of motorized, rolling, double electric organ set; in front of this, the wedding band from last night's post and, all about, well wishers and wedding guests.

The custom extends back into antiquity, when grooms would carry swords as they rode their white mares and sometimes, in some places, still do.

The procession would sometimes take the groom and his family to the home of the bride, sometimes to the wedding place. Destinations can vary.

The destination today will be a Ganesha temple not far away and then back again. The music is struck by the band and the rolling organ and then Manoj follows them to the road, as his bride follows behind.

And here is the band, and there is the rolling organ, the groom seen through the window behind. The music is loud, strong, energetic.... FUN... the members of the band tilt and jerk ever so slightly this way and that way, in a manner that strikes chords of "reverence," "cool" and "soul" all at once.

And here is the view from inside the rolling organ. Even now, way up here in Wasilla, Alaska, when I look at this picture I can hear and feel the music all around me; I feel the heat of the sun, roasting the air. I remember the glare of that sun upon my head and the burn of it against my skin.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The band, leading the way up the road.

The band leads the way to the temple.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The bride and groom make their alms...

They kneel before the altar...

They look upon and hold their offerings out to the idol of Ganesha, symbol of the Hindu diety Ganesha.

Ganesha.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The couple turns to leave the temple and return to the wedding hall.

The bride, in the midst of the groom's family, as she follows his horse back towards the wedding hall.

The procession suddenly stops - but the music continues. I had attended two previous Hindu weddings, both down south in Bangalore. There had been no dancing of any kind - not during the wedding, not during the reception and feast that preceded and followed the ceremonies.

But now, two young women begin to dance...

Then men begin to dance.

Such beauty, here beneath the hot, harsh, sun! I felt blessed, just to be able to witness such a moment.

The men danced with men, and the women danced with women. Those from Southern India joined right in (right). All laughed and had fun.

Now, joyously, both families mix together, they walk to the large opening into the hallway to the open-air wedding hall.

The bride and groom enter.

Soon, the bride and groom are on the wedding platform. The priest leads them through a number of blessings and rituals.

Finally, the priest hands two necklaces to the groom.

After placing the necklace made of thin, black beads around Sujitha's neck, Manoj follows with the gold.

Manoj and Sujitha are now formally wed in Hindu tradition, as practiced by the Lingayat. For any westerners who might think of Hinduism as a monolitic religion, it is not - no more than is Christianity with its multitude of different sects, each of which shares a certain basic belief in Christ but with countless variations and interpretations of it.

So too is it in Hinduism.

After draping each other with garlands, the bride and groom stand between their parents as rice flies. There are more events to happen - the washing of the feet of bride and groom by Sujitha's Uncle Murthy and Aunt Vasanthi, the placing of rings upon the toes of the bride by her mother, the giving of gifts, the posing for pictures...*

Even as the more than 1000 guests continue to file through the reception line, bearing gifts and offering congratulations and best wishes before moving into the dining room to eat, I join Murthy and Vasanthi in a cab. Ravi and Buddy give us their goodbyes...

And off we went, to see ancient new places in India, to the north and west. Before returning to London in a week, Sujitha and Manoj would stay in the Biradar home in Pune, and would make a series of visits to a number of temples.

Originally, it had been my plan to follow them through it all, but then Murthy bought me a couple of airplane tickets, reserved multiple touring cabs and hotel rooms for us all and invited me to follow him and Vasanthi on their tour of northwestern India. Suji said I must go, that Jaipur, The Pink City of Rajasthan was wonderful, a place she would like to go. I must not miss such an opportunity, she said.

So I did - and The Pink City was wonderful, as was Udaipur and Ahmadebad, where I got to wander through a quiet and serene compound that Mahatma Ghandi had made home.

 

At the beginning of this series, I stated my three purposes in coming to India on this, my third trip:

To attend Sujitha and Manoj's wedding, to learn more about India and to attempt to come to terms with the self-inflicted death of Soundarya by visiting the place where she had left this life, the crematorium where her physical matter had returned to the basic state of ash and dust, and to the sacred waters into which her dust and ash had followed that of her husband Anil's.

This journey with Murthy and Vasanthi would accomplish the second goal as stated above - to a degree. India is so vast and varied in landscape, history, culture and tradition that it would take a lifetime of study and travel to even begin to grasp it - if even to begin to grasp India is possible.

I never intended to draw this Return to India series out anywhere near this long, but it was just a slow process for me to work my way through the photos to this point. Essentially, what I have done here is to make an initial, rough, edit as I have crept along and I have involved readers in the process. Except to drop in on a few images here and there for spot checks, I myself had not looked at my different takes until just before I posted them here.

I have not yet looked at the takes I made while traveling with Murthy and Vasanthi. I will save that material for later times, to be dropped in a piece here, a piece there, as I must turn the attention of this blog back to Alaska very soon.

For now, this leaves only the journey in search of coming t terms and peace in the wake of death of the beloveds. Sujitha and I took this journey together, before we left Bangalore for Pune. So I will make one more post to relate something of this journey, followed by a quick post-script.

 

*I plan to made two slide shows as addendums to this post. One will be a more complete view of the wedding, to include images of the preliminaries to what I have posted today, as described in the narrative above, along with a bit of the followup. The second slide show will just be a score or two of portraits and faces of some of the many people who came to the wedding.

Before I make these slide shows, I will create the final post and post script and set them to appear tomorrow, the final post about 24 hours from now, the post script either the next day or late tomorrow night. If time will allow, I will then make the slideshow addendums and drop them in between this post and the final before I go to bed tonight. If time doesn't allow, I will drop them in tomorrow - but I want to get them in tonight.

 

 

 

Series index:

India series, part 1: With a little help from the Indian Air Force, I begin my India series without actually beginning it
Return to India, Part 2: Pain beneath the fan, a sprawling tree, monkey on a string; those I would soon join on a train ride; the garland
Return to India, Part 3: My Facebook friend, Ramz, her mischievous brother, her nationally recognized achiever mom, her dad at the wheel
India series, Part 4: When you overtake an elephant on the highway, be sure to pass on the right; birthday remembrance; In Wasilla, pass "oversize" on the left
Return to India, Part 5: I wander the cold, empty, streets of Bangalore
Return to India, Part 6: A cow, blessed and safe; Suji takes me to lunch, then goes out with Bhanu to do some wedding shopping
Return to India, Part 7-A: A three-snack outing as mother and daughter shop for Suji's wedding
Return to India, Part 7-B: On the painted holiday of the final full moon of winter, Sujitha and Kruthika go back to get a necklace
A spacer only - the Buddha and the glamour poster ad
Return to India, Part 8: henna, to highlight her beauty and deepen the love between bride and groom; a moment on the way to the train
Return to India, Part 9: A prayer and a blessing for Suji; we head for the train; three calls to Manu
Time for another spacer - the green man who showed up at the railroad station
Return to India, Part 10: The train to Pune, part 2: Sujitha by the window as a thin thread of her India flows by
Return to India, Part 11: On the train, part 3: Ganesh Ravi - Photographer: how we discovered his hidden talent
Return to India, Part 12: On the train, part 4: After dark
Return to India, Part 13: train ride, part 5: we click and clatter into Pune, take a perilous walk and step into a world beyond imagination
Return to India, Part 14: The groom his wedding suit; me in mine
Return to India, Part 15: A function to mark the final night Sujitha would spend with her family before the wedding
Return to India, Part 16: Inside the Biradar house: portrait of an elder woman - portrait of a young girl
Return to India, Part 17: We dine in the home of the groom's parents, then join in the Puja of Kalasha
Return to India, Part 18: Slideshow: Sujitha and Manoj at the wedding hall - Engagement and Haldi Night
Return to India, Part 19: The wedding band, in the visual style of Sgt. Pepper's (10 image slide show)
Return to India, Part 20: The groom rides a white horse to the temple, there is dancing in the street; Sujitha and Manoj are wed
Return to India, Part 21 - Benediction: Sujitha takes me to the sacred waters; fish dine - a crow flies
Friday
Apr272012

Return to India, Part 17: We dine in the home of the groom's parents, then join in the Puja of Kalasha

 

 

 

 

The drive by large van from the K. Ganesh home, where we were hosted, to the house of the groom's parents took somewhere between half-an-hour and 45 minutes. The bride used the time to apply her makeup and finish her beauty routine. By the time we arrived, Sujitha looked... well, see for yourself... stunning and gracefully beautiful! Now it was time to enter the home of Manoj's parents - the household that she was about to become a member of.

Along with a host of relatives who had come up from Bangalore and an uncle who had come from Wasilla, Sujitha was greeted at the gate of Manoj's father and mother, Mahadev Bimanna and Jayshree Biradar with a blessing.

As lunch is being prepared, Sujitha sits with her cousins, Aishu Visnu and Brindha Padmanabhan, in the upstairs living room.

 

 

 

 

 

 

There is time to visit and socialize. Sujitha returns to the lower level and then poses in the doorway to the Biradar home with Manoj. Above the doorway is a representation of the deity Ganesha, Remover of Obstacles, Lord of Beginnings. The doorway frame is decorated by the same forehead symbol that identifies members of the Lingayat faith.

Back inside, Sujitha visits with her close friend and former coworker in Bangalore, Ganesh Arumugham. In the aftermath of tragedy, Ganesh was her confident and comforter at work. Ganesh plans to marry in October. In the background, Sujitha's brother Ganesh talks with cousin Aishu.

As her father and brother-in-law to be pass by, Sujitha receives a hug from Aishu.

 

 

 

 

 

Sujitha and Soundarya - "Soundu" - had often spoke of the good times they would share together at the wedding of Suji and Manoj. Soundu is not here, but the unfinished tribute to her and Anil tattooed onto the bride's arm continually reminds us of her and in spirit brings her to us.

As requested, Suji puts her henna wedding art on display.

Not long after I took this photograph, Aishu and I were visiting and she asked me how I felt about India. I told her that I love India, and that I regreted that I had not come here earlier in life so that I could have came back more often, could have seen and learned more.

"But then we wouldn't have been part of your India," she responded. No, I argued, I could still have met them at my niece Khena's wedding - even after I had already gotten to know India and they would still have been part of my India. Since then, I have thought more about it. I think Aishu was right. If I had gotten to know India when I was younger, everything would have turned out differently. My relationship with the country would have been different. It would not have happened the same at all.

Aishu and her extended family are not only part of my India - THEY ARE my India.

I am glad now that I did not come earlier. I would not have wanted India any other way.

Soon, lunch was served.

As always seems to be the case in an Indian home, it was excellent. And don't let this fool you. The servings kept coming and coming. I ate in abundance.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

After lunch, there was a bangle function for Sujitha.

Suji receives instruction of the way of the Lingayat when it comes to wearing bangles.

Sujitha and Aishu.*

After the bangle function, Sujitha and Bhanu spent time meeting in turn with and socializing with different women family members and friends of the Biradar's.

There is a sacred necklace and locket Sujitha will be expected to wear from now on, although most of the time it will hang on the inside of her clothing and will not be seen. The Brahmin also wear a necklace to serve the same basic purpose, but it is made of gold and is different in design and make. She shows her Lingayat-style necklace and locket to cousin Bharathi Kalyan and mother Bhanu.

The earliest, pre-temple shrines in Hindu culture date back thousands of years and are built on a design called Lynga, said to symbolize the male and female union, in both the physical and spiritual sense. The Lynga is contained within the silver locket. A Rudraksh seed also serves as a prayer bead.

In the late afternoon - early evening, Sujitha's father Ravi will perform a lead role in a Puja function called Kalasha. In the meantime, lunch has left just about everybody feeling sleepy so they nap on the floor. Sujitha uses her dad as a pillow.

Ravi, performing the Puja of the Kalasha, along with Chandu Bagale, maternal uncle to Manoj.

 

 

 

 

Again, my knowledge is too limited for me to attempt to go into any detail, but the coconut, mango leaves and water in the post are considered to be a symbol of abundance and the source of life, to contain the elixir of life. The Puja Kalasha is considered to be auspicious, a prayer ceremony to request all the things it represents to be plentiful in the couple's life.

Priest Mallayswami conducts the puja. A videographer with a strong light also documents the event. I should note that this videographer was very polite and friendly and eager to help me out. He did not speak English, so we could not speak directly, but if he was not shooting and he saw me shooting into what he deemed to be too dark of a space, he would turn on his light just for me.

I didn't always want the light - sometimes, I just wanted the glow of a lamp, or the softer light natural to the room, but he made such an effort to assist me that I could not help but appreciate it and so just accepted it. I have decided that the strong, hot, glaring video light has become a natural part of Indian weddings and is just one more element for me to work with, rather than to rail against.

Ravi holds the plate with burning lamps.

Ravi wears the type of hat worn by the men in this part of India.

Participants are blessed and purified in the smoke.

Manoj is blessed.

Sujitha was blessed in the same manner. I photographed it, but I like this shot a few seconds later better.

The couple prays.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Chandu Bagale feeds Ravi either sugar or something made of sugar.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Ravi returns the treat.

Sujitha stands with Manoj and the family about to become her own.

 

*April 28: There is special significance to the ring on Suji's little finger that I was unaware of when I posted this. She explains in comments.

 

 

 

Series index:

India series, part 1: With a little help from the Indian Air Force, I begin my India series without actually beginning it
Return to India, Part 2: Pain beneath the fan, a sprawling tree, monkey on a string; those I would soon join on a train ride; the garland
Return to India, Part 3: My Facebook friend, Ramz, her mischievous brother, her nationally recognized achiever mom, her dad at the wheel
India series, Part 4: When you overtake an elephant on the highway, be sure to pass on the right; birthday remembrance; In Wasilla, pass "oversize" on the left
Return to India, Part 5: I wander the cold, empty, streets of Bangalore
Return to India, Part 6: A cow, blessed and safe; Suji takes me to lunch, then goes out with Bhanu to do some wedding shopping
Return to India, Part 7-A: A three-snack outing as mother and daughter shop for Suji's wedding
Return to India, Part 7-B: On the painted holiday of the final full moon of winter, Sujitha and Kruthika go back to get a necklace
A spacer only - the Buddha and the glamour poster ad
Return to India, Part 8: henna, to highlight her beauty and deepen the love between bride and groom; a moment on the way to the train
Return to India, Part 9: A prayer and a blessing for Suji; we head for the train; three calls to Manu
Time for another spacer - the green man who showed up at the railroad station
Return to India, Part 10: The train to Pune, part 2: Sujitha by the window as a thin thread of her India flows by
Return to India, Part 11: On the train, part 3: Ganesh Ravi - Photographer: how we discovered his hidden talent
Return to India, Part 12: On the train, part 4: After dark
Return to India, Part 13: train ride, part 5: we click and clatter into Pune, take a perilous walk and step into a world beyond imagination
Return to India, Part 14: The groom his wedding suit; me in mine
Return to India, Part 15: A function to mark the final night Sujitha would spend with her family before the wedding
Return to India, Part 16: Inside the Biradar house: portrait of an elder woman - portrait of a young girl
Return to India, Part 17: We dine in the home of the groom's parents, then join in the Puja of Kalasha
Return to India, Part 18: Slideshow: Sujitha and Manoj at the wedding hall - Engagement and Haldi Night
Return to India, Part 19: The wedding band, in the visual style of Sgt. Pepper's (10 image slide show)
Return to India, Part 20: The groom rides a white horse to the temple, there is dancing in the street; Sujitha and Manoj are wed
Return to India, Part 21 - Benediction: Sujitha takes me to the sacred waters; fish dine - a crow flies
Wednesday
Apr252012

Return to India, Part 15: A function to mark the final night Sujitha would spend with her family before the wedding

 

 

 

 

 

 

During a function that will mark the final night before the wedding that the bride stays in the home that houses her birth family, Bhanu prays for her daughter. If the family lived here in Pune, this function would be taking place in their home. As they, and I, are staying in the home of the family of their relative Krishnamurthy Ganesh the function takes place in his house.

Without someone like Manoj and Suji here to guide me, I will not attempt to describe the religious significance of all that is happening. Manoj's family is Lingayat, a religion within Hinduism founded in the 12th century by a Basavavanna, who had been Brahmin but wanted to abolish the caste system and so formed Lingayatism.

Sujitha is Brahmin by birth and upbringing but will now be considered Lingayat. Not so long ago, a Brahmin and a Lingayat could not have married, but now they can.

The priest, Mallayaswamy.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Sowmya Ganesh assists Sujitha after she applies the forehead markings that identify the Lingayat.

Sowmya then turns to Manoj and his forehead markings.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Sujitha and Manoj.

Priest Mallayaswamy blesses the couple whose wedding he will soon preside over.

Afterward, Bhanu is once again overcome with the same emotions she experienced when the train reached Pune. As family members gather around to give her comfort and support, she hugs her one surviving daughter. 

Now, Manoj and Sujitha will receive blessings from everyone in the house, beginning with the mother of K. Ganesh, Janaki Krishnamurthy who is bedridden.

Sujitha returns the blessing with her touch of compassion and love.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The couple then kneels before grandfather Natarajan to receive his blessings.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

They receive the blessings of Sujitha's hosts, the Ganesh's. And yes, once again, I gave the couple my blessings in the way of their own custom and tradition. Once again, it felt good, as though I were blessed myself - which I was: blessed to be there for this sacred and special event.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Blessings from the parents of the bride.

Afterward, everyone seemed to be happy, feeling good. Up to this point, all present, except the priest, had been relatives of the bride.

Then two of Manu's male cousins, Prashant and Jayantm arrived. Sujitha then served coffee to the priest and the male members of the family she is marrying into and had a cup herself.

Afterwards, she gathered the empty cups.

Then... dinner, south Indian style, prepared by Sowmya with a little help from her guests - and yes, once again, the dining was superb. Aishu Visnu, Sujitha's cousin, cultural sister, and close friend from Bangalore, expressed her fondness for Sujitha by feeding her.

Manu had returned to the home of his parents. His cousins had left also. Now, Sujitha joined her family and relatives for a final night of socializing before the wedding. Aditya, youngest son of the Ganesh's pulled out his guitar and began to strum and sing.

Suji got her turn and made everybody laugh. Everyone tried to get me to play, but I wouldn't do it. Once, I was fairly good on the classic guitar, but that was long ago. I haven't played in decades. The fellow on the right is Abhishek, who is studying to become a pilot in the Indian Air Force. His father is retired from the Air Force and now runs a business supplying aircraft parts to the Air Force.

Perhaps you have noticed the tambura in a few of the pictures that I took back in Bangalore in the home of Ravi and Bhanu. It belongs to Bhanu. She seldom plays it now, but on this night she was persuaded to play the guitar. She held it as though it were a tambura.

Somehow, even though she was out of practice and hestitant in her performance, when she played, she touched me deeply.

As Bhanu played, Aishu painted the toenails of the bride.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Aishu also painted Sujitha's fingernails.

 

 

 

Series index:

India series, part 1: With a little help from the Indian Air Force, I begin my India series without actually beginning it
Return to India, Part 2: Pain beneath the fan, a sprawling tree, monkey on a string; those I would soon join on a train ride; the garland
Return to India, Part 3: My Facebook friend, Ramz, her mischievous brother, her nationally recognized achiever mom, her dad at the wheel
India series, Part 4: When you overtake an elephant on the highway, be sure to pass on the right; birthday remembrance; In Wasilla, pass "oversize" on the left
Return to India, Part 5: I wander the cold, empty, streets of Bangalore
Return to India, Part 6: A cow, blessed and safe; Suji takes me to lunch, then goes out with Bhanu to do some wedding shopping
Return to India, Part 7-A: A three-snack outing as mother and daughter shop for Suji's wedding
Return to India, Part 7-B: On the painted holiday of the final full moon of winter, Sujitha and Kruthika go back to get a necklace
A spacer only - the Buddha and the glamour poster ad
Return to India, Part 8: henna, to highlight her beauty and deepen the love between bride and groom; a moment on the way to the train
Return to India, Part 9: A prayer and a blessing for Suji; we head for the train; three calls to Manu
Time for another spacer - the green man who showed up at the railroad station
Return to India, Part 10: The train to Pune, part 2: Sujitha by the window as a thin thread of her India flows by
Return to India, Part 11: On the train, part 3: Ganesh Ravi - Photographer: how we discovered his hidden talent
Return to India, Part 12: On the train, part 4: After dark
Return to India, Part 13: train ride, part 5: we click and clatter into Pune, take a perilous walk and step into a world beyond imagination
Return to India, Part 14: The groom his wedding suit; me in mine
Return to India, Part 15: A function to mark the final night Sujitha would spend with her family before the wedding
Return to India, Part 16: Inside the Biradar house: portrait of an elder woman - portrait of a young girl
Return to India, Part 17: We dine in the home of the groom's parents, then join in the Puja of Kalasha
Return to India, Part 18: Slideshow: Sujitha and Manoj at the wedding hall - Engagement and Haldi Night
Return to India, Part 19: The wedding band, in the visual style of Sgt. Pepper's (10 image slide show)
Return to India, Part 20: The groom rides a white horse to the temple, there is dancing in the street; Sujitha and Manoj are wed
Return to India, Part 21 - Benediction: Sujitha takes me to the sacred waters; fish dine - a crow flies
Wednesday
Apr252012

Return to India, Part 14: The groom his wedding suit; me in mine

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Before I jump straight into wedding related functions, I decided I need to quickly reintroduce the groom first. So here he is, Manoj Biradar, at a men's clothing store in Pune, checking the fit of the suit he will wear to his wedding.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

And here am I, with the bride and groom and Natarajan, in the suit Sujitha bought for me so I could attend her wedding in good style. Don't worry about the long sleeves. It will be tailored to fit me just right.

 

 

 

Series index:

India series, part 1: With a little help from the Indian Air Force, I begin my India series without actually beginning it
Return to India, Part 2: Pain beneath the fan, a sprawling tree, monkey on a string; those I would soon join on a train ride; the garland
Return to India, Part 3: My Facebook friend, Ramz, her mischievous brother, her nationally recognized achiever mom, her dad at the wheel
India series, Part 4: When you overtake an elephant on the highway, be sure to pass on the right; birthday remembrance; In Wasilla, pass "oversize" on the left
Return to India, Part 5: I wander the cold, empty, streets of Bangalore
Return to India, Part 6: A cow, blessed and safe; Suji takes me to lunch, then goes out with Bhanu to do some wedding shopping
Return to India, Part 7-A: A three-snack outing as mother and daughter shop for Suji's wedding
Return to India, Part 7-B: On the painted holiday of the final full moon of winter, Sujitha and Kruthika go back to get a necklace
A spacer only - the Buddha and the glamour poster ad
Return to India, Part 8: henna, to highlight her beauty and deepen the love between bride and groom; a moment on the way to the train
Return to India, Part 9: A prayer and a blessing for Suji; we head for the train; three calls to Manu
Time for another spacer - the green man who showed up at the railroad station
Return to India, Part 10: The train to Pune, part 2: Sujitha by the window as a thin thread of her India flows by
Return to India, Part 11: On the train, part 3: Ganesh Ravi - Photographer: how we discovered his hidden talent
Return to India, Part 12: On the train, part 4: After dark
Return to India, Part 13: train ride, part 5: we click and clatter into Pune, take a perilous walk and step into a world beyond imagination
Return to India, Part 14: The groom his wedding suit; me in mine
Return to India, Part 15: A function to mark the final night Sujitha would spend with her family before the wedding
Return to India, Part 16: Inside the Biradar house: portrait of an elder woman - portrait of a young girl
Return to India, Part 17: We dine in the home of the groom's parents, then join in the Puja of Kalasha
Return to India, Part 18: Slideshow: Sujitha and Manoj at the wedding hall - Engagement and Haldi Night
Return to India, Part 19: The wedding band, in the visual style of Sgt. Pepper's (10 image slide show)
Return to India, Part 20: The groom rides a white horse to the temple, there is dancing in the street; Sujitha and Manoj are wed
Return to India, Part 21 - Benediction: Sujitha takes me to the sacred waters; fish dine - a crow flies
Monday
Apr232012

Return to India, Part 13: train ride, part 5: we click and clatter into Pune, take a perilous walk and step into a world beyond imagination

In time, the darkness slips away and the sun rises. The members of Sujitha's wedding party begin to stir again.

The coffee is not the best... heated milk poured into cups partially filled with instant powder, kind of like Folger's.

Still, I have some more and it is okay - but I long to have a cup brewed by Vasanthi or Bhanu. Sandy had made coffee for me a few times before. She had the South Indian coffee technique down sound.

The sun lights up the henna of the bride.

Before leaving her home in Bangalore, Vasanthi had cooked not only last night's dinner but this morning's breakfast. Even a day later, it remains delicious. I just wish I didn't have this damned acid reflux condition - but Suji bought some Omezaprole for me and it works pretty good. I eat my breakfast and am glad to discover Vasanthi brought enough for seconds.

Natarajan observes this slice of India from the bunk where I had sporadically slept through the night. My other camera lies there with him.

Through the window we see young students in uniform, biking their way to school. 

We stop at a couple of stations where some passengers get off the train and others get on.

Suji gives her mom some playful affection...

...and then her dad, who maybe ate just a little bit too much... no, no, he didn't. How could one possibly eat too much of Vasanthi's cooking?

I continue to fantasize: Vasanthi's South Indian Home Cooking restaurant in Anchorage.

What used to be here? What is here now? Where are we? What is this place called?

Ganesh and Rangarajan - his father's best friend. We move along with others whom we do not know and never will know.

As the bride talks to the groom over the wireless, Bhanu gives her son an affectionate, soul-felt, hug...

...and then a more firm embrace...

Then a strong, strong, embrace, fully returned, follows. This is a gift we humans have been given - it surely does help us to enjoy the sweetness of life and to endure life's most bitter sorrows, both of which can be felt in the same moment.

A boy comes through selling Spiderman toys - when thrown against the wall, the hands and feet stick lightly to it, then the Spiderman crawls down the wall.

Suji buys Spidermen for Jobe and Kalib.

We reach the outskirts of Pune.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Suddenly, overcome with emotion, Bhanu grips her daughter's hand. She tells me she is about to lose her daughter, that after the wedding Suji will belong to another family and she will rarely see her again.

Sujitha wraps her arms around her mother. "No, Mum," she soothes. "It used to be like that, but not now. Manu's family is not like that." They are modern people and will not seek to isolate and separate Suji from her birth family, she tells her mother.

Suji assures Bhanu that she will always be her mother and she her daughter, by cultural norms, she will now be considered to be in Manu's family, but in spirit and love, Suji promises she will always remain her daughter and, in spirit and love, Manu will also be part of their family.

Distance and cultural traditions notwithstanding, Suji will keep this relationship strong and active, too. No matter what, she will be there for both her mom and dad. I know it. I won't tell you how I know, just yet, but I do. By the end of this series, which, despite all my long delays, is coming soon, readers will know how I know.

Soon, we reach Pune, where we are greeted at the station by porters who will carry our bags to the road - atop their heads. Suji is very concerned about the white bag. It is filled with sweets called Ladoos, made from graham flour flakes and sugar syrup, rounded into small balls. After the wedding, the Ladoos will be distributed to the families of both the bride and groom.

The sweets are delicate, and could easily be crushed if another bag were to be placed on top of them, or could be shattered were the bag to fall. 

The Ladoos won't be crushed now, but the perch of the unsecured bag atop the porter's head leaves Suji feeling most nervous. Her bag of delicate Ladoos is totally unsecured. What is to stop it from falling?

The walk will prove to be quite long...

SURPRIZINGLY LONG... we walk and walk and walk... for Suji, every step is a nervous one.

 

 

 

 

 

 

It reminds me of changing planes in Minneapolis and then walking from a gate at one end of the sprawling terminal to the other. Suji matches the porter, step for step. He seems very confident... but... still... the perch looks precarious... there is nothing to hold the bag in place... the slightest stumble, a sudden turn of the porter's head...

Finally, the road is reached, we step into the hot sun, the bag is lowered safely to the ground, Ladoos whole and ready to be shared.

 

 

 

 

 

And then I turn and see a sight that my Alaskan eyes can hardly believe... A World Beyond Imagination... Indeed! Suji pulls out her phone to call Manu and tell him we are here.

Speaking of which, up in Barrow, the Leavitt crew landed the first Arctic Slope bowhead whale of spring Sunday. In Wainwright, the Hopson crew did the same.

Speaking doubly of which, Melanie just arrived home in Anchorage after having spent the past month up on the Arctic Slope doing a job in the oil fields for her company. I have not seen her for almost two months before I left Arizona for India.

Speaking of Arizona, Margie and Lavina should be arriving back in Anchorage from Phoenix about 6:30 PM tonight, but Margie won't be able to come home because she must stay in Anchorage for the rest of the week to babysit.

So I am going to drive into town tonight to see my wife, daughter, and other family members. So I might not post anything and if I do it will likely just be an intermission post.

Then I will take this blog straight into preliminary wedding functions, and then to the wedding itself.

 

 

 

Series index:

India series, part 1: With a little help from the Indian Air Force, I begin my India series without actually beginning it
Return to India, Part 2: Pain beneath the fan, a sprawling tree, monkey on a string; those I would soon join on a train ride; the garland
Return to India, Part 3: My Facebook friend, Ramz, her mischievous brother, her nationally recognized achiever mom, her dad at the wheel
India series, Part 4: When you overtake an elephant on the highway, be sure to pass on the right; birthday remembrance; In Wasilla, pass "oversize" on the left
Return to India, Part 5: I wander the cold, empty, streets of Bangalore
Return to India, Part 6: A cow, blessed and safe; Suji takes me to lunch, then goes out with Bhanu to do some wedding shopping
Return to India, Part 7-A: A three-snack outing as mother and daughter shop for Suji's wedding
Return to India, Part 7-B: On the painted holiday of the final full moon of winter, Sujitha and Kruthika go back to get a necklace
A spacer only - the Buddha and the glamour poster ad
Return to India, Part 8: henna, to highlight her beauty and deepen the love between bride and groom; a moment on the way to the train
Return to India, Part 9: A prayer and a blessing for Suji; we head for the train; three calls to Manu
Time for another spacer - the green man who showed up at the railroad station
Return to India, Part 10: The train to Pune, part 2: Sujitha by the window as a thin thread of her India flows by
Return to India, Part 11: On the train, part 3: Ganesh Ravi - Photographer: how we discovered his hidden talent
Return to India, Part 12: On the train, part 4: After dark
Return to India, Part 13: train ride, part 5: we click and clatter into Pune, take a perilous walk and step into a world beyond imagination
Return to India, Part 14: The groom his wedding suit; me in mine
Return to India, Part 15: A function to mark the final night Sujitha would spend with her family before the wedding
Return to India, Part 16: Inside the Biradar house: portrait of an elder woman - portrait of a young girl
Return to India, Part 17: We dine in the home of the groom's parents, then join in the Puja of Kalasha
Return to India, Part 18: Slideshow: Sujitha and Manoj at the wedding hall - Engagement and Haldi Night
Return to India, Part 19: The wedding band, in the visual style of Sgt. Pepper's (10 image slide show)
Return to India, Part 20: The groom rides a white horse to the temple, there is dancing in the street; Sujitha and Manoj are wed
Return to India, Part 21 - Benediction: Sujitha takes me to the sacred waters; fish dine - a crow flies