800 Sarah's Way, Wasilla, Alaska: For sale?! - I launch a new project in the hope I might save the memory, if not the place itself
Monday, July 30, 2012 at 7:38AM ;)
No, my surgically-inflicted wounds did not suddenly heal enough and I become strong enough to set my phone aside, pick up my "real camera" and shoot photos such as this and the others you see on this page. I shot this image in our back yard late one night just a few days before I went into the hospital. I shot most of the other photos in mid-June on the day that Margie and I invited all of our children and their dogs out for a cookout so I could inform them of my impending surgery. I placed all the pictures in this post in draft form on June 28, the day before I went into surgery. I intended to write the text from the hospital, within two or three days of coming to with my right colon removed. I did not yet understand how weak I would be mentally and physically and how impossible it would be to write this text then. In fact, even now as I begin to write, it feels like a daunting task.
The point I want to make in leading with this picture is our backyard is not like most backyards in America, or backyards in most other places in this world. Moms and babies might come to visit most anyplace, but not this kind of mom and not these kind of babies.
Yes, this is our backyard, right here at 800 Sarah's Way, Wasilla, Alaska. Come March, we will have lived in this house for 30 years. This is where we raised our children, where our first grandson Kalib lived with his mom and dad for the first year or two of his life and now it is a second home to all three of our grandsons. Not so long ago, readers of this blog joined us as we held a funeral service for our magnificent tabby cat, Pistol-Yero, and then buried him in our pet cemetery a short distance into the trees behind this moose family
There are parts of Wasilla that have utterly gone to hell in anti-esthetic, un-zoned, rip-and-pave commercial development, but out here, on this spot, we live in our own little enclave of paradise. To us, this one-acre lot upon which we live is a most special place. It is the place I would like to live until I die, hopefully of old age.
Yet, thanks to the insanity of the American medical system, into whose insurance coffers I donated many tens of thousands of dollars and possibly more, I think, until my insurance company saw fit to squeeze me out, we now stand in jeoprady of losing it all, possibly in short order. I have been trying to think of a way that we might save this place, or, if not, to at least save the memory of our time here and tell the story of our 30 years in this house on this one acre.
And so I launch this project to create such a book and to find the funding to carry it out:
800 Sarah's Way, Wasilla, Alaska: For Sale?!
;)
As you would suspect, I have been taking pictures out here since we first moved in. In the early days, I did not take anywhere near as many as I do now, because I was shooting on film, film cost money and so did the chemicals to develop it. In those days, I shot strictly black and white and then once I would develop the film, I had to find the time and money to print the pictures.
Even so, I was always taking pictures professionally. When the time to develop my film would approach, I would wander about the house and yard and would shoot the unexposed frames on whatever I found - my children, mostly.
No one has ever seen the big majority of the pictures I took in the early days - not even me, except in negative form when I pulled the film out of the wash and hung it to dry. Margie would often complain that we had no pictures of the children to hang on the walls and put in scrapbooks. I would answer that we had plenty of pictures and sooner or later I would get around to printing them, but given everything else I was doing, and all the pictures I had to print to do my work and all the layouts I had to make and all the stories I had to write, I seldom ever got around to printing any of those pictures. Every few years, Margie would grow so disgusted with me, she would haul the kids into Anchorage and get them photographed at the studio housed in J.C. Penney's.
Then she would hang those photos on the wall. I would feel a bit embarassed, as I was never enamored with the J.C. Penney's style of shooting, I knew my own pictures would be much better, yet I had been trumped. It was all my own fault, of course.
;)
Yet I am confident that if I could find the time to search through all my negatives from this time, I could find more than enough good photos of the kids and the life we lived here then, combine them with the later photos I took after the cats began to move in and I bought a film scanner, plus the huge amount I have taken since I bought my first digital camera and then edit them into a package to tell the story in a book/iPad app.
It would take A LOT of time to do this.
So my idea is to seek funding for such a project. Ideally, I would like to secure a sum to cover the combined cost of our home equity loan and property tax for a year and then to dedicate the money to this task.
The only fundraising idea I seem to be coming up with at the moment is Kickstarter, where different projects are presented to the public online, a minimum fundraising goal is set and then contribution pledges are sought from a worldwide audience. If the minimum goal is reached, then the project is funded to at least that amount - more, if more money comes in.
I have pledged to a few Kickstarter photography projects myself, at least three of which have been funded, but I think it is getting harder to win funding dollars through Kickstarter, as the competition appears to have greatly increased. A few months ago, I pledged to a photography project I judged to be well worthwhile but it failed to gain the minimum pledge total - which was considerably less than my minimum pledge amount would need to be.
So it might be pretty tough for my little project to gain the needed funding.
But then, who knows? Maybe it would have a chance, especially if I can tie some national issues into it. So many Americans have lost their homes in recent years. So many Americans, including health-insured Americans, have gone broke and lost all security they ever had due to medical disaster and there is a huge effort under way to repeal the perhaps inadequate but still only real plan on the table to try and solve the health care/insurance fiasco that has put our continued stay in this house in such jeopardy.
;)
Before I went into the hospital, I reported it was going to cost me about $80,000. I had no idea how to pay such a huge sum, so Margie and I started to think maybe we would need to sell this house. As it turned out, that $80,000 was a happy fantasy. Add in my two trips to the emergency room since, my second surgery, at least two more CAT Scans and two more hospital stays and then how much do I owe? I have not yet seen all the figures, but I am certain the $80,000 must have at least doubled by now, perhaps it is even climbing towards the $200,000 mark. How do we deal with this?
Whatever amount we might get from the selling the house would not even come close to solving the problem. Our equity in this house will fall far short of covering our debt, but it would be better to sell the house than to have it repossessed or confiscated. If we do, where do we live, what do we do?
At the moment, I have nothing going workwise. My income for the month of July now totals $350 less expense - for two prints sold through my blog store. When you are self-employed and you can't work, you can't make money. I do expect to receive a modest check next week, but it will be gone pretty much the moment we get it.
I do have an excellent prospect to do a superb project and will find out sometime in August if it is actually going to become reality. I am confident it will, yet I have been confident about prospects before and have had them fall through. Assuming it does come through, it will provide a decent enough income to keep us going for a year or two under normal circumstance, but not nearly enough to deal with this new burden.
Anyway, that's my basic idea. Kickstarter may or may not be the best place to seek funding. I hope that among those who read this will be an interested person or two with sharp fund-raising skills who might suggest some other possibilities.
I must note we have much more wildlife here than just moose - that's a mosquito biting Kalib just above his eye.
;)
As this and my original blog make evident, I am a natural born wanderer. I am compelled to travel, to wander into other places, see new things, meet new people and share in their ways of life. I tend to develop strong attachments to just about every place I visit and to bond with people I meet. This is true whether the place is the Arctic Slope, where I feel a stronger communal bond than I do to Wasilla, or to India, where, even with the heartache, I have been blessed to have gained a whole new branch of family.
Yet, there is one tiny acre of this earth with one house upon it to where sooner or later I always long to return. In this house, upon this one acre, I feel more comfort and peace than I ever have anywhere else - right here at:
800 Sarah's Way, Wasilla, Alaska.
It is my sanctuary.
;)
I do wage an internal argument about whether or not I should really try to fund this project at all. I absolutely do want to make a book based on our time in this house, but in many ways would prefer to put this book on hold and instead seek funding to finish other books I am already working on. Two of these deal with topics which currently relate to the larger national discussion.
Mitt Romney has heightened the national interest in all things Mormon, but he seems not to want to talk about his own Mormon experience. I grew up intensely Mormon. My story and that of my family ultimately played out very differently than any other I have ever seen in published form. I strongly want to do a book on my Mormon experience and I have the stories and the photos right at my finger tips to create what I believe will be a powerful work.
;)
Right now, due to the offshore oil development ambitions of Shell Oil and the high-latitude accelerated impacts of global warming, the eyes of the world are focused on Arctic Alaska with an intensity not experienced here in decades. All the major media is covering it, but I have a unique take, one that none of them will get. It ties in with Kivgiq, the great celebration of song, dance, feast and gift-giving Iñupiat tradition says was given to the people by the Eagle Mother in antiquity.
This book, too, is sitting right here, at my finger tips. Were I to somehow find the full-funding to do it, it would take me a bit longer to put together than would my Mormon experience, but it is a book I must do and soon.
;)
Then there are other books I need to do soon that may not have the national and international significance of these two, but are important to me and I believe I can make them important to a larger audience as well - books such as Soundarya! White Mountain Apache, Missoula, Montana...
So part of me thinks I should put one of a Mormon or Kivgiq book on the foreburner and save 800 Sarah's Way for later. Yet, if we lose this house, then I want to do this book as soon as I can. And if doing such a book could somehow help us save this house, then it feels imperative that I move it to the top of the list.
;)
That's about it, I guess, but I do have a few more pictures I took here on that day to share. I want to be certain to work all my children who grew up here into this post.
;)
Last week, I read a story in the Anchorage Daily News about apartment living in Anchorage. I was a bit stunned to realize that on the average it cost considerably more than we pay on our monthly home equity loan for a couple just to rent a modest apartment.
;)
Somehow, Caleb did not get into the pictures from that day. I think its because he already knew about my pending surgery, as he lives here, so this picture is from a different day.
;)
This one is from a different day, too, but I decided to close with it as it does show our house and the number, "800" reflected in mirror image off the car window as Jobe's parents prepare to drive him and his brothers back to Anchorage.
By the time this post goes up, Margie will be driving me into Anchorage for my third CAT Scan. I am optimistic it will reveal that my anti-biotic treatment has done its job and eliminated the abscesses. I am also trying to fortify my mind and to prepare myself, just in case it hasn't and I find I must face the pain, setback and additional expense of a third surgery. I am a little worried as well, because some of my stitching is pulling apart and the chasm in my tummy seems to be enlarging, but I hope the doctor can easily fix this today with a few replacement stitches.
...Say... did you see the opening ceremonies to the London Olympics of 2012? If so, then you saw the segment on the UK's national health care system. You saw the pride the people and nation displayed over the fact that they have actually done what is necessary to take care of their people. What has happened to me would not happen to any citizen of the United Kingdom. In fact, there is only one country in the industrialized world where such a thing could happen to an individual: The United States of America.
Don't anyone misinterpret my words. I am an intensely loyal American. I love this country with all my heart. But if you saw the opening ceremonies, then please give the matter some thought.
Reader Comments (12)
When my nephew and his wife had horrendous medical bills from a pre-mature birth and the mother almost dying as well, they had no insurance either. They declared bankruptcy for medical bills. Have you looked into that possibility?
Bill, I would definitely talk to a bankruptcy attorney and explore options. When my husband and I had some serious financial issues we filed chapter 13, our home was protected, and a payment plan was established for us to repay a portion of the debt over 4 or 5 years. Took us a few years to re-establish our credit, but it was worth it compared to doing nothing and being completely buried in debt. This was back in the late 1990s, and I'm sure the laws have likely changed, but something to consider. You shouldn't have to lose that house!! Good luck!
Bankruptcy may be an option, but does not include protection from bank forecloser as it has in the past. The gop took that option away for the average citizen. People like Trump do this all the time.
Good luck & I love your photos.
Jeanabella
Best wishes for a speedy recovery and viable solution to your (budding) debt following (crucial) medical treatments! As a Canadian, I am appalled that you folks don't have universal health care as we can readily seek treatment without fear of 'losing our homes'. I think this is truly outrageous and cruel for ANY civilized society to charge its citizens to virtually, stay alive!!!!
THANKS FOR SHARING your gorgeous pictures of Alaska and your adorable family!!!!
Uncle Bill, I'm going to add to the explore bankruptcy discussion. I know our family doesn't think that way. But in a country that isn't sensitive to healthcare needs, it is sometimes the only option. It is better that you have a roof over your head, and as you said, it would be more expensive for you to live elsewhere. Also, look at IndieGogo for fundraising. You don't have to meet the minimum to get funding. And, when my dad went through his major medical issues two years back, we had options to explore like MediCal (there may be an Alaska equivalent), Medicaid and disability. Fight for your home. That should be the very last thing the banks can take. Much love to you. If you need help with IndieGogo/Kickstarter, etc. I'd be happy to provide it.
Oh, and look into adding a "Donate" button to this blog. You can do it through PayPal.
Another suggestion - the hospital's financial department should be able to offer some options, I'm sure you're not the first uninsured person they've encountered. Also investigate any State and Federal assistance options - again the hospital should be familiar with those. I remember at first being horrified at the need/thought of pursuing bankruptcy, but we put pride aside and let the system, broken though it may be, work for us as much as possible.
Put a donate button on the blog.
I also recently returned from the UK and have been to several other countries that enjoy the benefits of universal health care. Everyone I met in these countries spoke about and is proud to support their health care systems. Nobody cries “Socialist!” or “Death panels!” in these countries. Instead, they decry the inhumanity of not having such a system in place in the U.S. I was deeply ashamed when one person in New Zealand told me the number one reason for bankruptcy in the U.S. is a hospital bill. However it came to pass that insurance companies are needed in the U.S. health care equation simply boggles the mind. It breaks my heart to think about you recovering from what appears to be a cascading health care disaster and having to worry about losing your home. Shame, shame shame on us. More people should have engaged in the health care debate when it was front and center. Now that the Supreme Court decision is behind us it is time to go back and work on a better bill that really can make a difference.
There was a donate button, paypal I believe. Bill, did you remove it? I would like to donate. :)
While you might not "think that way," consider that healthcare has become a privilege in our country. This is an egregious injustice to the people who can't afford medical care. It sounds like you have paid your dues over the years. This is one of the things our taxes can pay for, bankruptcy. Declaring bankruptcy over and over to make a profit because it was a "good business decision" for Trump is wrong. Declaring bankruptcy for medical only is just survival. You need a place to live.
I am taking all thes suggestions seriously and will look into the bankruptcy.. When I get a bit past this most recent onslaught of pain, I will add a donate button. Thanks
I think my last post got eaten by the toobz so I'll try again.
I think before declaring bankruptcy or selling your house you should look at negotiating a rate with the hospital, a reasonable rate. If you were insured, the insurance company would pay the hospital at a "negotiated rate", a rate that in my experience has almost always been less than half and sometimes 1/10 the full rate the hospital/ doctor bills. I think Medicare has even lower negotiated rates. The hospital offered you a "pay us now" price. They might try to say that offer is off the table, but I think the hospital would like to recover something from you rather than nothing. That is, I don't think anyone is expecting 100% payment of what they're going to bill you because they wouldn't get 100% from an insurance company or Medicare.
Here's what I would suggest. Wait for all the bills to come in from your various surgeries and treatments. See if you can find out through Medicare, your state's Medicaid, or an insurance company what amount they would pay. I'm not sure how you're going to find that out, but every insurer has a schedule of their negotiated rate for every procedure code. Or simply figure out what is 20-25% of the total. Isn't that what their "pay us now" offer was? Talk with your family and figure out realisitically what you could pay over the next 3 years. Is it even close to 20-25%? If it is, go to the hospital and offer them 75% of what you think realistically you can pay so you have a little room to negotiate up if you want to. Be ballsy about this. Tell them you'll put a % down and pay every month, without interest, and pay them the balance within 3 years. Something else you can do in addition to this is ask if the hospital has a charitable foundation that might absorb some of the cost.
In addition, I think someone close to you should sponsor a fundraiser. Take a sampling of a variety of your projects over the years, hand them to someone you really trust with some photographic and writing talent ( you have those super-talented kids!) and let them put together a "Best of Bill Hess" book. Spread the word far and wide to all your friends throughout the country, your clients that the book is available for $25. I think if people were aware of your circumstances, they would come out of the woodwork to help you considering the kindness and friendship you've shown to so many people. Don't consider it charity. They'd be buying your book!